Too much sugar

I am determined to eat well and exercise today.  I’ve done okay, just okay, with exercise lately, but my eating has really gotten off.  I’m still eating healthy, nourishing food, but it’s laced with sweets and goodies!  Oh, I wish I had not gotten my sweet tooth from my dad!

I knew that if I posted my weakness here that I would think a little harder before I gave into another treat.  I don’t want to come back here, hanging my head, saying that I had two pieces of chocolate cake, 4 cookies, a bag full of chips, a hand full of left over Easter candy, and a heaping bowl of vanilla ice cream smothered in chocolate syrup!  (Why do I have this stuff in my house!?)  Believe me, I’ve had days like this, well, maybe not a bag full of chips, instead it would have been a couple of candy bars!!

Okay, so here’s the plan.  I will have a breakfast of oatmeal and a protein shake, maybe a piece of fruit.  Immediately after breakfast, I’ll head outside with the kids for a speed walk.  Sophie in the Ergo, Gabe and Chloe in the buggie.  (I did this with Chloe in the stroller the other day, it was a heck of a workout.  I’ll be adding about about 50 more pounds,  I hope I can make it.)   Hope to come back later and post of my success!

Off we go!

 

Body Image

I’m attempting to write a post with Sophie sitting in the activity center beside me.   She is the only one down here now.  Gabe is up in our room “resting” until 7 and Chloe is still in her room sleeping, I think. 

Eventually I want to write a couple of cute things that Gabe has said, but for now I’ll just say that to remind myself of it later. 

I’m really getting hard core about working out and eating right.  I’m a little apprehensive though because the more serious I get the more the old “ugly” thoughts start creeping back into my head.  It’s funny being pregnant three times in a row really eleviates negative thoughts that you might have about your body.  I mean, your body is going through the most amazing thing ever, it’s really a miracle, all that goes on in a pregnant womans body.   It’s hard to be negative about your body when you’re carrying life.  Then if you’re like me, c-section only, your body is healing for a good 6 months, and your thoughts give way to “it’s okay, you just went through major surgery three times in three years.”  So bad thoughts don’t start creeping in till about now.  When you start getting fed up with using the excuses and want to get that cute little body back (something you weren’t even happy about then, because you were so obsessed with the way you looked.)  I think I’d be pretty happy with myself now if I looked like I looked then, at least, I hope I’d be happy. 

The thing I think I’m least happy with now is the way my stomach looks.  If it was just flabby I’d be somewhat okay.  I can work that off, but with the stretch marks and the unnatural lump above my insicion site, I look a bit disfigured.  My husband is the sweetest ever and tells me I’m beautiful and I believe he means it, it’s just a person looks at their own body a lot differently than someone else. 

Well, I hope that by writing these things I might feel a little more determined to think more positively of my body.  After all it did just house three of the most beautiful blessings!

Speaking of, they are all three up now and demanding the attention of their disfigured mother!