Charlotte Mason on Offending the Children

This is my caveat before reading my thoughts on this section of Charlotte Mason’s volumes(or any of them for that matter). Please don’t take what I have to say about her writings as her writings herself.  I am learning as I go along and if you feel that I have erred in properly portraying what Miss Mason is thinking, please let me know.  I am eager to be more educated in her thinking and this is one of the tools that I am using to do just that. If you want to know more about Charlotte Mason please read her volumes and my posts together. You can also read my friends posts on the same sections here.  We are reading and posting our findings together.

Taking up where we left off; how we offend the child.  Charlotte Mason says offending a child is putting a stumbling-block in his life.  A stumbling-block is “that which trips up the walker and causes him to fall.”  We can either place the stumbling-block there or not remove it.  Either way the child falls and we offend them by doing what should not be done and despise them by not doing what should be done.

Charlotte Mason then attempts to describe how the child is born law-abiding.  I was confused by her use of the word “abiding.”  I suppose I have always thought of the term “abide” like one would use “abide by.”  I would venture to say that Charlotte Mason is not using the latter. She states that the child ”is born a law-abiding being with a sense of may, and must not, of right and wrong.”  This, to me, doesn’t mean that he actually “abides by” this sense of right and wrong, only that this sense of moral law is there.  And at least one definition of “abide” might fit her use of it being; to continue in a particular condition, attitude, relationship, etc.; last.  Meaning that God has written this moral law on our hearts, that is our condition.  If indeed, she is using this term in that sense then I whole heartedly agree with her.

She goes on to say that a child with this innate sense of right and wrong begins to go astray little by little when the mother does not take her role of inclining his ear to this sense seriously. A mother can do this by letting a child get away with a transgression because “it’s just so cute,” or inducing shame or guilt when no transgression has been made.  With these little games the child eventually learns that all he has to overcome is his mothers disapproval. There is no direction to heed the law that is within.  He has only learned to get his own way by learning his mothers likes and dislikes.

Next, Miss Mason says that children must know that their caretakers are Law-compelled.  The one sure way to offend a child is for a mother to feel that she is free to raise the child according to her desires and the feeling that the child is “hers to do what she like(s) with.”  The mother does not hold to the idea that she has a sense of duty to her child.  When the mother has not made this mistake the child comes to realize and learn that there are areas that mother does not relent, especially in the area of right and wrong.  The child gradually becomes more sensitive to their own moral law within when their caretakers have been appropriately teaching them that there are things that must  and must not be done.

Lastly, Charlotte Mason talks about three more areas where a parent can offend a child.  In the area of health, not feeding them right, or giving proper exercise or providing well ventilated living quarters.  In the area of their intellect, giving boring lessons and allowing the child to become placid with learning and seeking other thrills.  And in the area of their moral life.  This one seemed a bit obscure to me, but I think it has to do with the idea of a mothers unfair affections leading to the moral decay of the child.  The example she gave was about a women whose mother always doted on her younger brother and never had a smile or even a look her way when she came to the nursery.  She said that in her adult life she doesn’t feel natural with her mother and her and her brother don’t have the fond feelings for each other that they could have if things were different.

Please comment if you agree or disagree with how I have summarized Charlotte Mason’s thinking on offending the children.

 

Charlotte Mason on The Child’s Estate

A friend of mine started reading Charlotte Mason’s first volume several weeks ago and began posting her thoughts on her blog.  I’m thrilled that she, of all people, is doing this because she is wicked smart and I know I will glean much from her insight.  I will probably not be as disciplined (nor as skillful) as her in posting, but you may hear from me once in a while about my thoughts on Miss Mason’s writings.

I have a few thoughts on what Charlotte Mason says about the child’s estate.  Mostly, that I like it.  And I should because her ideas are straight from Scripture.  She states that a child is likely to be a tablet to be written on or clay to be molded, “but he is much more–a being belonging to an altogether higher estate than ours; as it were a prince committed to the fostering care of peasants.”

This is just so good for me.  I need to hear these things because mothering five little children sometimes doesn’t feel like anything too significant.  Many times I fail at even treating them like decent human beings, let alone princes and princesses.  Miss Mason goes on to quote verses of the Bible concerning children and tells us that we need to pay attention to any references the Bible makes about children and take note, too, that these verses first belong to us as adults who are to become as little children.  Sigh….

She then discusses the Code of Education in the Gospels which isn’t so much what we should do for them, but rather what we should not do to them.  “Take heed that ye OFFEND not–DESPISE not–HINDER not–one of these little ones.”  She states that as we think about the things that “we may not do, we are greatly helped to see what we may do, and must do.”

In our next few readings she will discuss these particular offences.  You may be hearing from me.

 

Updates, Mae Day and isms

I am currently working on a post that will be highlighting our Cumberland Island trip, but for now I have a few updates.

Today little Hazel will be going in for a pediatric urology appointment.  It seems that her enlarged kidney that was detected in utero may be causing some problems in her little urinary tract.  Last week she came down with a UTI and let me tell you a five month old with a UTI is bad news.  It was so sad, she nursed all night with her little body wiggling because she was so uncomfortable.  We pray for answers and treatment at the urologist today.

This year for school we started a little group called Mae Day.  A small group of us moms decided it was finally time to give our kids the enrichment activities that Charlotte Mason highlights in her method of education.  We created a blog to document this event and hope you will join us.

We were getting the kids ready for bed a few nights ago and Sophie came to me and said, “Mama, I know of a way to get my kids to brush their teeth when they don’t want to.”  She went on to tell me that after her children said no to her request a few times she would tell them they were going to play a game and she would say, “Simon says, brush your teeth.”  Then they would scurry to brush their teeth happily.

I told her that she will be such a sweet and fun Mama.  She said, “Yeah, and I would only have two spoons, one for cooking and one for scratching my back.”

We were reading our Old Testament reading at breakfast one day about Solomon and his many wives.  The children were curious as to why Solomon had so many.  I told them that he began to get very greedy about having for himself the most beautiful women.  He wanted only the best in everything including his wives.  Gabe asked, “Do you think you would have been one of his wives?”  Me: ”Well, I don’t know, why do you ask?”  Gabe: “Because you’re so pretty.” This, at breakfast, in my pajamas, I have done nothing at all to prettify myself.  AND he kept going.  “Don’t you guys think Mama is pretty?  I think she is so pretty, Mama is really pretty.”

You can imagine, that made my whole day.

 

Pigs and School

The kids and I are together writing this post.  Here are some things that have been going on lately.

We bought a Guinea Pig.  She is a girl, her name is Bella. (Those lines were put in by Gabe.)  I have to write and say that I think she is the sweetest Guinea Pig I’ve ever known, but I haven’t really known very many.  She is also very pretty and I’ve never thought Guinea Pigs were very cute.  But she is.  I’d also like to say that I am very excited about cleaning her cage.  I’ll explain.  We started her in a cage kit which included recycled blue paper bedding.  It was mess, little blue paper chunks everywhere.  When I did a search on the best ways to clean Guinea Pig cages I found a few sites that talked about providing a soaker underneath a fleece.  Naturally, I was very drawn to this because I use cloth diapers with the same effect.   So Gabe and I went and picked out two prints of fleece.  One is a camouflage print and the other is pink with yellow and orange flowers (and both were 50% off!).   I lined the bottom with bed pads (I got them for night time accidents) and then put the fleece over the top to wick away moisture.  We’ll change her bedding when we change our sheets.   Along with their morning chores each child has a chore for Bella.  One sweeps her droppings with a mini handheld broom and dustpan.  One changes her water. And one makes sure she has fresh food and sweet hay.  We love having a pet. :)  And from what I understand of Guinea Pigs they are not very cuddly.  She is very much so and will just sit and let us pet her as long as she can bury her head into the towel she is on.  Okay, enough with Bella.

We started school today and it was fun.  Daddy did Reading and History.  I did the rest.  I’d like to record our schedule and subjects here because it’s just fun to look back on. (I don’t have to do the record keeping that some of my friends have to do in NY).  Here are the kids’ narrations from today.  Daddy accidentally read the wrong story in our Fifty Famous Stories which Gabe really liked so he told that one to me.  Chloe did the one that was supposed to be read.   I don’t know that I will do this every time, but yet again, it will be neat to look back on.

Narrations by Gabriel Aug 2010

King Alfred and the Cakes

There was a very good king and he was very good to everybody and he was very nice. A king has a very hard life because wars happen all the time. He pretty much always wins the wars because he is such a good king. The Danes were a very strong army too. They started to fight the good king. They fought and fought until finally Britain scattered the good kings men. And the good king fled and ran into a swamp. As he came out and walked he saw a woodcutters house. He knocked on the door and a woman opened the door and he asked if he could have something to eat. The woman did not know that he was the king. And the woman said he could have some food and water. She said, “If you will watch these cakes I will go milk the cow.” And as soon as she left to milk the cow he forgot all about his hunger and the cakes and started thinking about how he would put his army up the next day. As the woman came back and the cakes were sizzling and burnt into hard crust, she scolded him and said, “A lazy man who wants food should work.” And I was told that she actually beat him on the back with a stick.

Narrations by Chloe Aug 2010

The Sword of Damocles

There was once a king who had lots of riches but no one really liked him. And one day Damocles came to the palace. And he said to the king, “Will you give me all your riches for one day?” So the king took Damocles into the palace and he showed Damocles the gold. When Damocles sat down he looked up to see what the jingling was and there was a single horse hair that was hanging a sword. When Damocles saw the sword right above his head he could no longer eat any food or drink any wine. And then the king came in and he said. “What is the fright Damocles?” And Damocles said, “There is this sword hanging above my head.” And the king said, “I always have a sword hanging above my head.”

Charlotte Mason does not recommend children under the age of six to provide narrations, but Chloe has been doing them beautifully on her own since she was 3.  So I’m thinking there really is no harm to ask her, especially seeing that she thoroughly enjoys doing them.

One of the stipulations Daddy had in getting a Guinea Pig was that the children had to come up with five interesting facts about them.   We have yet to do so and Chloe is eager to now.  I better stop playing around and get our assignment done.

 

I love homeschooling my kids

I have to admit there were some times when we were just thinking about homeschooling that I wondered if I would really like it or if it would be something like a chore.

It is no chore.  It is something that I am excited about doing everyday.  I do enjoy the break when weekends come only because there are things that desperately need to be done around the house, but when that school day starts again, I’m happy and ready to go. 

Granted, I’m just doing Kindergarten this year so it really is lots of fun.  Watching the kids grasp concepts, make profound statements and ask questions that I don’t know the answer to is so thrilling.  When Gabe comes home from his one day of Veritas it’s hard to get anything out of him about his day.  I often wonder what it would be like for longer days at five days a week in public school. 

Not only is it just fun to teach my kids, I’m spending time with them that I will never be able to get back.  I’ve read some organization books lately because of our move. (Highly recommended, I didn’t know there was such great information out there on getting organized.)  One of the books talks about how time is our most precious commodity.  I know we’ve all heard it, but it struck a chord with me when I read it.  We can get money back if it’s spent or stolen, we can replace material things if taken away or broken, but time is something that is gone forever once it is spent.  How do I want  to spend my time? 

I have a small secret and it is this:  Before homeschooling, I was beginning to grow weary of the time I spent with the kids.  Playing pretend, dress-up, and dollies was starting to drive me crazy.  I found myself making little excuses as to why I couldn’t play with them.  I felt really bad about this and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t enjoying these things anymore.  We all needed new challenges, new discoveries, new worlds for our imaginations to play in.  Homeschooling has provided that for us.  I love watching my children learn and see them take their new found knowledge and express it in their play.  And I love that we, as parents, were the ones to help impart that knowledge, that we are a part of their world through work and play.  It makes me smile. 

I am so excited to announce that we might be following Ambleside Online (AO) exclusively next year.  We’ve enjoyed Veritas for accountability and an outlet for Gabe to be in a learning environment with other children, but we are not in love with Veritas.  With the risk of sounding a bit cheesy, I’m in love with Charlotte Mason.  I’ve incorporated some of AO’s curriculum with Veritas and hands down, have enjoyed AO much more.  Gabe has taken a big interest in early american history, stories of battles and pioneer adventures.  (And Rome, after receiving the Playmobil arena for Christmas, he wants to know everything about the Colosseum.)   Miss  Mason states that “education is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life.”  I’m not feeling that with Veritas or any other curriculum.  Here is a short excerpt from the preface of a  book I keep at hand all the time, When Children Love to Learn. 

“Miss Mason was profoundly Christian, rooted in Scripture and immensely practical…She drew her view of human beings and especially of children from Holy Writ: ‘And first let us consider where and what the little being is, who is entrusted to the care of human parents.  A tablet to be written upon? A twig to be bent?  Wax to be moulded? Very likely; but he is much more–the Bible shows the deepest insight into what is peculiar to the children in their nature and estate…’ ”

Okay, I was only going to write a few minutes on how I love homeschooling and now it is way past my bedtime.  I’m a teacher, I’ve got to get up and be prepared to educate my children!

Until next week…

 

Mother Goose

I’m flirting with making a light CM schedule of sorts for the kids just to say that I am doing something.  I’ll post it later, but for now I just wanted to share a little something I read about Mother Goose rhymes.  I was one of the ones who have thought, “Why Mother Goose, the poems are so strange?”  I’ve read them to my children since infancy because it just seemed the thing to do, but I have often wondered what use they are.  Here is part of the article. 

Mother Goose rhymes may seem silly and senseless and we may be tempted to pass them by in favor of more ‘meaningful’ books. As Christians we may feel that our childrens’ time would be better spent on more uplifting thoughts. But the popularity of Mother Goose goes farther than nonsensical fun, it actually helps children with speech, words and later appreciation of literary works. It is an entertaining, painless way to prepare children for a living books education later.

“Children entering kindergarten would have better speech habits, and first-grade children would have a greater power with and feeling for words if more were done with Mother Goose in the homes. Knowing dozens of the verses expands the imagination, increases the vocabulary, and develops an ear for the music of words. Enjoying Mother Goose predisposes children to other books” (May Hill Arbuthnot, of Flora Stone Mather College, Western Reserve University from her book “Children and Books,” 1947)

The child who loves to hear and repeat the rhymes as he plays and even moves his body to their rhythm is doing more than having fun, he is assimilating language. Arbuthnot says, “Such spontaneous recitations and physical responses train the child to more vigorous speech, even as his ears are trained to enjoy the various sound combinations that make Mother Goose such a splendid introduction to English poetry.”

Now I know!  You can read more about it at the site below, but that was about the gist of the article.

http://www.amblesideonline.org/MotherGoose.shtml

 

Feeling the Pressure

I’ve had a huge break in stressing out about how I want to homeschool my children.   Along with the new year comes the pressure to get things started off on the right foot.  I’ve been doing a lot of reading on Charlotte Mason and am, for the most part, sold out on her philosophy.  This coming from someone who can be less than discerning in the material that I read.  I’m going at it slowly and prayerfully. 

I hope to post of my learning and the children’s progress, but I don’t have much confidence in myself that I will keep very current.  I think being accountable to the Confession is enough pressure for now!

I’ll add links to sites that I have found most helpful in my journey.  I also just ordered the book, “For the Children’s Sake” by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay.  (Thank you Heather for her introduction!)   And I have been very slowly reading “The Oiriginal Home Schooling Series,” by Charlotte Mason, Volume 1(of six) “Home Education.” (Thank you Holly for your generosity in lending this precious Series to me!)  I’m on page 65 of about 350, I’ve been at it for a few months.  It is not light reading so I’m glad not to plow through it like I normally would, I want it to soak in. 

Okay, I’m off to play with the kiddos.